Reading this for years made me think that I wouldn't make the same mistake because I knew better. Now as I sit here at my desk thinking about the past two years, I see that I was so wrong. Even though I didn't realize it at the time, I was just like the other girls. I suppose we all have to experiance it for ourself to really understand what it is to trust God.
I just knew that God was going to let things work out the way I thought they would. Everything seemed to be going so well, it seemed that God was answering my prayers, and all the puzzle pieces were coming together. Everything seemed perfect in my eyes and I gave God the glory for it.
Over the past month I have seen all my dreams vanish. All of a sudden everything changed and my dreaming came to a halt. Out of all the ways my story could have went, this was not how I ever expected it to go. I was left confused, afraid to dream. I didn't plan this.
Now I see that this is all part of God's plan for my life. If things had went as I wanted them too I would have been in a mess. My Lord knew that my plan was not the best for me so He graciousely and lovingly took my dreams away. Now am trying to live day by day, asking God what He wants me to do. Which reminds me that as Paul said in Romans 8:26, "Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered." Perhaps the wisest prayer we could ever pray is "Nevertheless not my will, oh Lord, but thine be done."
Even though this is not how I was hoping things would turn out, I can clearly see that this is God's will and truly His will is good, perfect, and acceptable.
"And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God." Romans 12:2